kittzy07To be angry to your child
Anger to the world, to mistakes, to your enemies or to yourself; it's all normal. But to be angry to your child, it will be the biggest and dumbest thing you will ever do in your sorry life.
Especially, if you get mad to them (your children) because you're stressed from work or from anything that has nothing to do with your kids. That is not fair for them. Sometimes they just want to get your attention or just want to ask you something. Because they're just kids, they tend to be a little irritating sometimes. But that's not a reason to shout at them.
There are times when you spoil them so much and they don't listen to you anymore. It's like they're thinking, "Why should I listen to them? They love me so much, they wouldn't dare to punish me..." But we do. We explode when we're shocked at what they have done. Especially, with their younger siblings.
What I do is:
- Internalize myself.
Yoga. Meditation. Count one to gazillion. Or whatever you need to do to stop you from shouting or even hurting your child.
- I talk to them sincerely (even 2-year olds do have diplomacy).
Like what I have read in a magazine that children often listen to repeated shouting of commands and whatnot.
- Tell them what will be the consequences of what they are doing.
Children knows what they are doing but sometimes they don't know what will be the effect. Explain in a logical way. Don't tell them that monsters will eat them if...
- Give them my full attention.
They do stuff to get your attention. After breaking the whole house, well...?
- Talk the talk.
Not baby-talk them but know their language. It really hurts me if I can't understand what my child is saying. What I can do is ask my kid to point what she needs or is trying to say. Sometimes, she acts what she's trying to say.
- Play with them.
Shut down the computer. Turn off the TV. Let's play.
Especially, if you get mad to them (your children) because you're stressed from work or from anything that has nothing to do with your kids. That is not fair for them. Sometimes they just want to get your attention or just want to ask you something. Because they're just kids, they tend to be a little irritating sometimes. But that's not a reason to shout at them.
There are times when you spoil them so much and they don't listen to you anymore. It's like they're thinking, "Why should I listen to them? They love me so much, they wouldn't dare to punish me..." But we do. We explode when we're shocked at what they have done. Especially, with their younger siblings.
What I do is:
- Internalize myself.
Yoga. Meditation. Count one to gazillion. Or whatever you need to do to stop you from shouting or even hurting your child.
- I talk to them sincerely (even 2-year olds do have diplomacy).
Like what I have read in a magazine that children often listen to repeated shouting of commands and whatnot.
- Tell them what will be the consequences of what they are doing.
Children knows what they are doing but sometimes they don't know what will be the effect. Explain in a logical way. Don't tell them that monsters will eat them if...
- Give them my full attention.
They do stuff to get your attention. After breaking the whole house, well...?
- Talk the talk.
Not baby-talk them but know their language. It really hurts me if I can't understand what my child is saying. What I can do is ask my kid to point what she needs or is trying to say. Sometimes, she acts what she's trying to say.
Shut down the computer. Turn off the TV. Let's play.
